Can Masturbating College Freshmen Actually Clog a Shower Drain?

Put a bunch of 18-year-old boys together, and you may get an overload of testosterone. A buffoonery that has been battering about college dorms for years now takes this excessively literally and pokes fun at the portentous amount of semen college freshman inevitably produce—specifically, in the shower, when, uh, you know. The buffoonery is to post an official-looking notice in a communal bathroom decrying the fact that the abundance of in-shower masturbation has created a buildup of semen then drastic it is clogging the drains .
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Photos of the notices have been circulating on the internet for years now, with variations of the same note embossed with letterhead from prestigious colleges and universities all over the global : Georgetown University, the University of Pennsylvania, the University of Michigan, the University of St. Andrews, etc. Just last week, another double of one such notice posted at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill made its rounds again .
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This detail detect, from Ehringhaus Residence Hall, asserts that masturbation in the showers is in irreverence of the Carolina Housing Code and that the drains “ are not built to withstand semen. ”
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“ Every class UNC spends thousands in care because of the excessive measure of semen stuck in the pipes, ” the comment reads. As extreme as that sounds, this one actually doesn ’ thymine tied go a far as some other letters—UPenn ’ sulfur warned that if the position was not remedied, the staff would resort to DNA testing to find the perpetrator .
The notices themselves, of run, are fake—likely the result of upperclassmen hoping to make anxious freshmen even more sexually uncomfortable than they are .
“ These signs were not authorized nor endorsed by Carolina Housing, ” an e-mail air to on-campus residents read. “ Please disregard the notice. ”
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But we couldn ’ thyroxine avail but wonder … did this authoritative September whoremaster have real-life origins ? Is this actually something that colleges worry about each fall, or something abundant shower masturbators have experienced in their own lives ? Could excessive semen actually clog a drain ?

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To answer these fabulously important questions, we foremost tried the people we were convinced would know—the alimony staffs at colleges across the nation. They ’ re the ones with front-row seats to a presumable semen onslaught. It turned out that they had better things to do than talk to us ( bazaar ). Of the more than 20 maintenance heads, college PR staff, and facilities teams we reached out to, none of them returned our calls. In fact, one university media relations official responded that he did not feel it would be “ allow to pull person away from his or her job for this. ”
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following, we turned to the scientific literature. As it turns out, there appears to be very short research published on the direct effects of semen in shower drains ( free dissertation idea ) .
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other internet theories have noted that semen does feel stickier when it gets wet, though the reason for that has been elusive. A NSFW Claymation video about this phenomenon suggests that water might actually react with semen in some way to make it stickier, but it doesn ’ t propose a compelling cause of precisely why this would happen .
It ’ south besides possible that semen simply feels like it ’ randomness stickier in the shower because it ’ mho being compared with water. Either manner, you can see why a freshman guy who possibly has masturbated while bathing might notice stickier semen and worry about the dorm-bathroom warnings. But can semen, sticky or otherwise, clog a drain ?
Nope, it can not .
Abraham Morgentaler, an companion professor of urology at Harvard Medical School and the director of Men ’ s Health Boston, debunked the rumor for us once and for all. In an e-mail to Slate, Morgentaler says that not only is semen never thick enough to clog a drain, but that 20 to 30 minutes after ejaculation, it will become a fluid liquid and slide away :
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When a serviceman ejaculates, the fluid first comes out like a gel, with a certain total of consistency that probable helps with birthrate by allowing it to stay long within the vagina than if it were a fluid liquid .
For this cause, a semen analysis is never performed immediately on a fresh specimen. The lab technicians need to wait until it becomes a liquid, which takes 20-30 minutes.

As a predominate, semen equitable isn ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate slurred enough to clog a drain. And after a light time it will become fluid like water anyhow .
Carrol Platz, an assistant professor in cell biology at Baylor College of Medicine and the founder of the International Canine Semen Banks, agrees : “ In humans, normally the semen remains liquid and would not clog drains. ” other mammals, obviously, have rubbery semen, but if you ’ ve got chimpanzees masturbating in your showers, you probably have problems beyond drain .
so shower masturbators, it looks like you ’ re in the pass .

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